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Friday, July 24, 2009

Tales From Shmuely Boteach’s World

Michael Jackson’s ‘rabbi’ speaks of a need to embrace one’s imperfections. 

by Adam Stone in the Baltimore Jewish Times
http://www.jewishtimes.com/index.php/jewishtimes/news/jt/local_news/tales_from_shmuely_boteachs_world/13633

When Rabbi Shmuley Boteach spoke recently at Congregation Kneseth Israel in Annapolis, approximately 200 people heard a moving lecture on the role of Judaism in contemporary society.

But the rabbi’s most recent fame has come from other quarters. Dubbed “the most famous rabbi in America” by Newsweek, Rabbi Boteach shared his Shabbat table for two years with the late superstar Michael Jackson.

“Michael was like anybody,” Rabbi Boteach told the BALTIMORE JEWISH TIMES. “He had the good and the bad and there was a lot of good there, but unfortunately a lot of the corruption in his life eventually overtook him and he died a tragic figure.”

Rabbi Boteach recalled his efforts to help set Mr. Jackson on a healthy course — how he urged the singer to give up prescription drugs, to take time off from his career.

“I tried very hard to get him to rehabilitate his life. I wanted to surround him with serious people,” said Rabbi Boteach, 43, who lives in Englewood, N.J. “The Michael that I knew was very ordinary. I wish he would have seen himself as being ordinary, but I think his greatest fear was of being ordinary. He wanted to be special.”

Rabbi Boteach himself has carved out a special sort of career in recent years. In 2008, he served as Oprah Winfrey’s marriage, parenting and relationships expert on her “Oprah And Friends” national radio network. He has appeared frequently on Ms. Winfrey’s television show, as well as on the “Today” show and “Good Morning America.”

Rabbi Boteach is the author of the recently-published “The Kosher Sutra” (HarperOne), an exploration of desire and passion in relationships.

He came to Annapolis as guest speaker at the 24th annual Rabbi Morris D. Rosenblatt Memorial Lecture. Rabbi Rosenblatt served as spiritual leader of Kneseth Israel from 1945 until his death in 1985.

Rabbi Boteach is founder of the non-profit organization The World: The Values Network and its Friday is Family (fridayisfamily.com ) program.

“Jewish values have immense healing powers,” he said. “Jewish notions of love, values and relationships, Jewish notions of struggle, Jewish values of learning: We can be a light to the world.”

Rabbi Boteach suggested that Jews ought to be sharing their values with the broader society. He lamented that too often this is not the case. “Many secular Jews compartmentalize their Jewish identities. They may go to shul a couple of times a year, but their lives are not shaped by Jewish values and Jewish wisdom,” he said.

In the realm of family, he said, less ritually observant Jews have capitulated to American values. “Judaism believes that children are paragons of innocence,” he said. “Western value says you have kids if you can afford them.”

The Orthodox, he said, are no less guilty of hiding their light under a bushel.

“One of the things we Orthodox can be guilty of is that we live very Jewish lives, we are very attached to our Yiddishkeit,” he said. “But when we go out into the world, we feel we have no obligation to hallow the world, to sanctify the world. We see the world as goyishe.”

One gift the Jews might make to the world, Rabbi Boteach said, is the gift of struggle.

“Living in a Christian land, the model of living is Jesus, it’s perfection,” he said. “‘What would Jesus do?’ And when we compare ourselves to models of perfection, we come up short. We feel inadequate.”

Judaism, on the other hand, recognizes fallibility.

“There isn’t a single perfect person in the Bible,” Rabbi Boteach said. “Every single one of them, Moses included, had to struggle. Now, if you describe righteousness as struggle rather than as perfection, you become a lot more accepting of yourself.”

Judaism can address big questions, he said. “How do you curb your tongue from lashon harah [evil speech]? How do you curb your temper?” Rabbi Boteach asked. “How do you learn to give away 10 percent of your hard-earned money, even when you are poor yourself?”

A nation that can embrace personal struggle comes out stronger, he said, and more ready to face life’s challenges.

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